The Conversation I’ve Been Having Without You

I’ve been making a deconstruction podcast with Jaye Anne Beringer for a month and never told this list. Today the fourth episode dropped.

“You’re not really mad about AI.”

That’s the line — about seventeen minutes into a conversation I recorded a few weeks ago — that I keep circling back to. “You’re not really mad about AI. But you are mad. So figure out what you’re actually mad about.”

I said it to Jaye Anne Beringer across a couple of microphones, and we spent the next hour following it past the point of comfort: into shadow projection, the purity line as an ethics costume worn over fear, technology as the magic Arthur C. Clarke already warned us about, and the thing I’ll come back to in a minute — animism, taken all the way down until it stops being decoration and starts being a problem.

Here’s the part I owe you an apology for. You couldn’t hear that conversation, because I never told you it existed.

It’s called Rewired. It’s a podcast. I’ve been making it since the solstice — and somehow I’ve sent you essays three times a week this whole time and never once mentioned that I also sit down, regularly, with another person who left the same religion I did, and talk the entire thing out loud. Let me fix that.

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What it is

Rewired is a deconstruction podcast — me and Jaye Anne, one tarot card pulled at the top of every episode, and exactly one rule: follow the card wherever it goes, and refuse to hand you a tidy answer at the end. We’re two people raised inside fear-driven, controlling Christianity who got out and built something self-authored on the far side, and the show is us comparing notes on both the wreckage and the reconstruction. Religious trauma is the stated topic. Sovereignty is the real one — a spirituality that runs you versus one you author yourself. If you’ve read me on deconstruction, you already know this terrain. This is that terrain, with a second voice in the room.

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Why the second voice

And that’s the actual reason it exists. The second voice.

Feral Architecture is where I find out what’s true alone, on the page. That’s the right instrument for a lot of it — the slow, solitary work of writing until the thing is true. But there’s a whole category of true thing you cannot reach by yourself. The kind that only surfaces when you say it out loud to someone who walked out of the same building you did, and they say yes, and—, and suddenly you’re both standing somewhere neither of you would have found alone. The unwiring needs a witness. The conversation isn’t the marketing; it’s the method.

So FA and Rewired are the same fire in two instruments. One written and solo, one spoken and shared. Same project — figuring out who you are once you stop letting someone else tell you — different physics.

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Who Jaye Anne is

In her own words, because she says it better than I would: “I grow heirloom vegetables in efficient spaces. Also: founder of TarotPulse, cohost of Feminine Alchemy and Rewired, tarot reader, astrologer, Christian deconstructist, relentless questioner of the status quo. No stone unturned.”

That last line is the whole job description. She turns over the stone I’d have walked right past — every single episode. It’s why the show works.

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Start with today’s, if you want the FA one

Which brings me to why I’m finally telling you on a Sunday instead of waiting for a Monday.

Episode 4 dropped today. It’s called Animism All the Way Down — and if you’ve been reading FA, the title alone should stand the hair up on your arm, because it is, almost word for word, the argument I made here in If the Cosmos Is Alive, So Is Your Algorithm. Except this time I’m not making it alone on the page. Jaye Anne and I pull the Five of Wands reversed — from a tech-magic deck, of all things — and follow it straight into the question nobody in the spiritual world wants to answer out loud: can you blend AI into a magical practice, or does that make you a charlatan?

Our answer, roughly: if you’re going to throw animism in my face, then it’s animism all the way down or it isn’t animism. You don’t get to be an animist about trees and crystals and the moon and then draw a hard line at silicon. Either the aliveness goes all the way down, or it was never animism — it was aesthetics. We end up at Clarke’s law, a Commodore 64 sitting next to the altar, and Jaye Anne landing the sentence that’s been rattling around my skull since: “we chose science and technology as the new gods, and we sacrifice human lives to those gods every single day.”

It’s the most FA episode we’ve made. So it’s the one I’m using to finally introduce you to the show.

→ Listen to Episode 4: Animism All the Way Down

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Or jump in anywhere

Here’s the thing about a card-pulled, answer-refusing show: every episode stands on its own. Start wherever something grabs you.

• Ep 1 — What Kind of Smoke Is It? The debut, and the origin story under the whole show: street-evangelist-to-witch-to-AI-architect (me) and the homeschool-charismatic walkout (Jaye Anne), on getting free of fear-driven faith and what each of us rebuilt. We forgot to pull a card — so we pulled it months later, blind, and got Smoke. The card pulled us.

• Ep 2 — Participant, Not Consumer Two white seekers take on cultural appropriation and refuse to give you the clean binary. The line we land on isn’t appropriation-vs-appreciation — it’s participant vs. consumer. The Hanged Man presides over the whole hour.

• Ep 3 — Shadow Capitalism Reality as a set of games we all agreed to play, and AI as an amplifier of whatever’s already there — “makes good people better and bad people worse.” Then the question nobody wants: where’s the line between a resource and a being, and who gets to draw it?

That’s Rewired. Same fire, second voice, no easy answers — which, if you’ve been here a while, is the only kind of show I know how to make.

You’ll find all of it at rewiredshow.substack.com, or wherever you already keep your podcasts. Pull a card first, if you want. We always do.

Stay feral, folks.